Ever had one of those days, months or years when everything feels impossible? While it might sound cliché, gratitude is one of the most powerful tools we have to help us through tough times. This is because it helps us to reframe the difficulties while also nurturing your mental and emotional wellbeing.
Life isn't always sunshine and rainbows. Sometimes, it can feel totally overwhelming and painful. Whether this is because the Universe is bringing up shadows to be looked at and healed or because your outer reality is that circumstances outside your control are causing you to feel out of control and beyond your current scope of coping and handling things.
Rick Hanson, a neuroscientist says that our human brains are like velcro for the negative and teflon for the positive. When we are in that energetic space of feeling overwhelmed or feeling like a victim of life, our brains tend to focus even more on what's wrong, magnifying our internal levels of stress and anxiety. We don’t have to live in that space though, we have control over our thoughts and can thus decide to shift the thoughts and stories that contribute to us focusing on the negative.
What The Science of Gratitude in Tough Times?
I’m glad you asked ;) The first major reason is because gratitude helps to rewire your brain, more specifically the neural pathways in your brain. The brain has a remarkable ability to reorganize itself by forming new neural connections, a phenomenon known as neuroplasticity. Gratitude can play a significant role in this process by encouraging the brain to form new, positive thought patterns.
In fact, research conducted at the University of Southern California found that when participants practiced gratitude (and the correlating feelings), their brain scans showed greater neural sensitivity in the prefrontal cortex which is responsible for stress relief, subjective value judgments, fairness and economic decision-making. The feelings of gratitude also help the body to release dopamine and serotonin (the “feel-good” chemicals).
While gratitude doesn't erase problems but helps you build mental and emotional strength to face them aka resilience while also helping to break the cycle of negative thoughts. Researchers at the University of California, Davis, led by Dr. Robert Emmons, found that people who kept a gratitude journal reported fewer health problems, better sleep, and more positive emotions. Gratitude helped break the cycle of focusing on what's wrong, which reduced overall levels of stress and anxiety.
How Gratitude Helps When Life Feels Awful?
It helps ground you in the present: Gratitude brings your focus back to the now, rather than stressing about the past or future. Many of the emotional struggles we face come from dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. When we ruminate on what went wrong or anticipate worst-case scenarios, it amplifies stress and anxiety. Gratitude shifts your mental focus away from these timeframes and directs your attention to the present moment — the here and now. This is always helpful because the only place we can affect change in our lives (and truly live them) is the now aka present moment.
Imagine someone going through financial struggle (aka its me, I’ve been here). They could spiral into anxiety about the future or regret past financial decisions. However, taking time to appreciate what they currently have — like supportive friends, their health, or even small daily comforts — shifts the focus back to what is good in this moment, helping them find grounding and peace amidst the uncertainty. I can say from personal experience, this is a game changer.
It also helps to reduce overwhelm: Shifting focus to what’s working (even if it's small) creates space between you and the constant barrage of difficulties. When life feels overwhelming, it’s easy to get lost in a flood of difficulties, where everything seems to go wrong at once. This can lead to a sense of paralysis or burnout because it feels like there’s too much to handle. Gratitude acts as a mental “reset button,” helping you zoom out from the chaos and notice the things that are still going well.
Gratitude also doesn’t require grand gestures — it can be as simple as appreciating a good meal, the sound of rain, or a kind text from a friend. Focusing on these small positives creates mental space, a buffer between you and the constant stressors. This, in turn, gives you the emotional bandwidth to handle challenges more effectively. It shifts your focus from "everything is wrong" to "some things are right," which reduces the intensity of overwhelm.
Consider someone dealing with chronic illness (aka me in the past…). They may feel overwhelmed by their symptoms and medical appointments. Practicing gratitude for things like a day with less pain, a helpful doctor, or moments of support from loved ones doesn’t minimize the illness but provides mental relief by highlighting what’s still going well. This reduces the sense of being consumed by the illness.
It also helps to strengthen relationships: Expressing gratitude to others can foster deeper connections, which are crucial during hard times. When you express gratitude to others, it helps them feel valued and appreciated, which enhances trust and emotional intimacy. In turn, people are more likely to reciprocate with kindness and support. This creates a positive feedback loop of connection, which is particularly important when you’re feeling isolated or struggling.
If someone is going through a tough breakup (again personal experience talking here), expressing gratitude to friends who offer support can deepen those friendships. A simple thank-you to a friend who listens or takes them out to distract them creates a stronger bond. This deeper connection provides emotional resources to help them navigate the pain of the breakup.
The Realism of Gratitude…
In a world filled with influencers telling you to only focus on the “love and light” while ignoring or bypassing the hard stuff… Gratitude is the opposite of toxic positivity. Gratitude isn't pretending everything is fine — it’s acknowledging the hard stuff while choosing to appreciating the good, beautiful, and positive that’s still in our life. Our lives are also not an “either or” situation, its about the “and” which means it’s okay to feel pain/sorrow/grief and be grateful at the same time. One doesn’t cancel out the other.
A few “hows” for practicing gratitude when life feels hard:
Start small: When life is heavy, it's okay to find gratitude in something simple — like a warm cup of coffee or a favorite song.
Keep a gratitude journal: Commit to writing down 1–3 things each day that you're thankful for, no matter how minor they seem. This can be as little as eating a yummy breakfast, to having a job to go to, or even that the sun is shining today.
Gratitude rituals: Incorporate a daily gratitude practice, like reflecting before bed or during your morning routine. Occasionally I take a walk outside and feel gratitude for every step I take, every tree I see, bird I hear, etc.
Feel the Feels: Most importantly, feel into “why” you’re grateful. Its one thing to be like “i’m grateful for the roof over my head”. Its on a whole other level when you’re feeling the feeling behind it and it shifts to “i’m grateful I have a roof over my head because its cold and rainy outside, yet i’m warm and dry and so comfy.”
Remember, even though it may seem like I’ve painted gratitude out to be THE solution, it's not a cure-all. However it can be a steady hand to hold when life gets rough and begins to pave the path for even deeper personal growth and healing. It also helps to rewire our brain which provides huge long term benefits as well as helping to interrupts the negative thought cycles we are so prone to getting stuck in. So overall, its a quick (doesn’t take long to see and then feel some grateful feels), simple tool to help us feel better both now and longterm!
What is one thing are you grateful for right now and why? Drop it in the comments below so we can celebrate with you!
Are you ready for more gratitude and feeling good in your life? Join Us for "The Magic of Gratitude" — a transformative class where we’ll dive deep into the power of gratitude and how it can reshape your mindset, even when life feels challenging. We’ll talk a little more in-depth about the science-backed benefits of gratitude, learn practical tools to stay grateful through tough times, and get hands-on with fun, creative gratitude exercises. Plus, you’ll walk away with prompts and strategies to keep the practice going long after the class ends!
Three times for you to choose from:
In Person: October 8 at 7pm in OKC at Radiant Living Center https://www.facebook.com/share/YPyrMkMUA3rqFks4/
Online: October 15 at 1pm CDT/2pm EDT/7pm UK OR October 23 at 7pm CDT/8pm EDT https://tidycal.com/radicaljoyfulness/the-magic-of-gratitude
Comments